Tuesday, March 04, 2008

All Jonco

He said… I don’t know why you wear a bra; you’ve got nothing to put in it.

She said…You wear briefs, don’t you?

He said… Do you love me just because my father left me a fortune?

She said…Not at all honey, I would love you no matter who left you the money.

He said… Since I first laid eyes on you, I’ve wanted to make love to you in the worst way.

She said…Well, you have succeeded.

He said… You have a flat chest and need to shave your legs, have you ever been mistaken for a man?

She said…No, have you?

He said… Why do you women always try to impress us with your looks, not with your brains?

She said…Because there is a bigger chance that a man is a moron than he is blind.

He said… Let’s go out and have some fun tonight.

She said…Okay, but if you get home before I do, leave the hallway light on.


Dear Abby, A couple of women moved in across the hall from me. One is a middle-aged gym teacher and the other is a social worker in her mid-twenties. These two women go everywhere together and I’ve never seen a man go into or leave their apartment. Do you think they could be Lebanese?

Dear Abby, What can I do about all the Sex, Nudity, Fowl Language and Violence on my VCR?

Dear Abby, I have a man I can’t trust. He cheats so much, I’m not even sure the baby I’m carrying is his.

Dear Abby, I am a twenty-three year old liberated woman who has been on the pill for two years. It’s getting expensive and I think my boy friend should share half the cost but I don’t know him well enough to discuss money with him.

Dear Abby, I’ve suspected that my husband has been fooling around and, when confronted with the evidence, he denied everything and said it would never happen again.

Dear Abby, Our son writes that he is taking Judo. Why would a boy who was in a good Christian home turn against his own?

Dear Abby, I joined the Navy to see the world. I’ve seen it. Now how do I get out?

Dear Abby, My forty year old son has been paying a psychiatrist $50.00 an hour every week for two and a half years. He must be crazy.

Dear Abby, I was married to Bill for three months and I didn’t know he drank until one night he came home sober.

Dear Abby, My mother is mean and short tempered. I think she is going through mental pause.

Dear Abby, You told some woman whose husband had lost all interest in sex to send him to a doctor. Well, my husband lost all interest in sex and he is a doctor. Now what do I do?

Jonco rocks!

Via Jonco.



Blogger Jonco said...

Thanks for the links. I appreciate it.

9/15/2008 08:22:00 AM  

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