Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk, and Kill.

And apparently "Pose", but I'm just going by the picture.

UPDATE: Had to change "I ran into this" to "I ran across this". Didn't like the grammar. I'm worried about grammar? What the hell?

Anyway, I think I've done it now. I've invited Johnny* and Chuck to hunt me down and kick my fucking ass.

NOTE: This update includes a change to my last post about Starbucks©.

Hey Starbucks©, the picture suggested this to me. Test try your cheap coffee, with refills, in the Mid-East. If it doesn't work out, fine, but give those suckers a break. Just saying.

Almost forgot. Starbucks©, when you go to the MId-East, take a printout of my last post. The guys will love it more than your coffee.

In looking for Starbucks© logos, I ran across this. The highlighted part is why I'm posting it. Its from back in September which explains how Chuck can be campaigning in the US for Mike Huckabee now.

My little bro is a Marine in Iraq. I thought he was going over there to fix damaged electronics equipment but apparently his base has become a C-List celebrity [I'd rate Chuck B-List -ed] hangout. Here's his last email:

"As you can see in the pictures I've sent, I work with Chuck Norris. We've been working together professionally for a while now, but only recently has our relationship developed to more of a friendship. I've been giving him a lot of advice lately on how to improve his Kick Start Program (his program for troubled teens). He feels that because of my experience in having a troubled youth, I can give first hand advice on how to deal with kids from "the streets." He also asked me to help train him for his next film. I'm putting him through a conditioning program to get him back in shape: his total gym [think that needs caps - ed] that he's been using for years obviously hasn't done the trick. I'm throwing in a lot of martial arts training, too. The movie has nothing to do with karate, but we train anyway since he's not very good at karate.

Interesting shit ain't it?

To be honest, I'd give a nut, OK, maybe a little finger to be in the shape Chuck Norris is. Yeah, a little finger. The short one on the right hand where the doctor removed the joint after the karate debacle and it no longer bends. There's no way Chuck's up to the level of a younger, recently conditioned US Marine.

Doesn't Chuck look short? Maybe Johnny's just really tall.

* Johnny's name was linked to the picture. I don't know him, but he seems like a decent guy and being a Marine pretty much confirms it in my mind. My next door "idol" was a Marine and I hold them in the highest regard. Well, except for the killing people part, but we all have jobs to do.

Via OH, Pepper?